Date your wife

I just finished a great book by Justin Buzzard called, "Date your Wife". This is not a book review by any means (I wouldn't have a clue how to do that anyways), so don't check out just yet!    

What I do have a slight clue about though is learning from past mistakes (because I've made millions).

When Kim and I got married, life was fantastic.  It was like we were still dating, but way better!  I got to go home with this woman every night, nobody to worry about but ourselves, go do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted, sleep as late as we preferred, etc.  It was pretty awesome. 

But then we had kids.  Don't get me wrong I adore my kids.  Outside of my relationship with Christ, my wife and kids are my greatest treasure.  I would die for these 3 people.  

Kids though...well...they change the game a little bit.  

They're demanding.  

They take all your time.  

They zap all your energy.  

I'm ok with that for the most part, except letting all my time disappear and all my energy get zapped brought on other issues.  Big issues.

I didn't guard my heart against neglect of my marriage.  And that responsibility falls on me.  And men, it falls on you.  

Men, we are commanded to be leaders in our marriage.  We are called to love our wife as Christ loved the Church (Ephesians 5).  Let that sink in.  I'm to love my wife like Christ loved the Church? He gave Himself up for His church.  I'm commanded to love my wife like that?

Yes.  I am.

You know who was really bad at following the command to love their wife like that, though? 

>This guy<

I Failed.  Miserably.  

But praise God for the Gospel.  It covers my failures.  It says there is forgiveness, restoration, and redemption at the cross. And God in His infinite mercy and Grace, has blessed my marriage to be even better now (with 2 kids, I might add) than it was in the beginning when I had thought it was at its PEAK! Why? He forgave me. He allowed me to learn from my mistakes.  

And so did Kim.

I learned to love my wife better.  I learned how to better prioritize Kim and her needs. I learned I needed time alone with Kim, (probably more than she needed it with me). And, I'm still learning.  And, I've got a long way to go to be the husband I'm called to be, but I can say I've gotten better.

How did I learn to be a better husband?  I got in the Word. There is NO substitution for this. I got counseling. I watched other men in Godly marriages. I read quality books. "Date your wife" is one of those kinds of books.  It's gospel-centered, and has great practical tips and ideas that are easy to implement.  

So men, get in the Word, and see how we're called to love our wives. Let's spend time with our wife. Get a babysitter and go out.  Go on a trip, just you and your bride. Spoil your wife sometimes.  Let's not just tell her we love her, show her!  

What are some ways you "Date your wife"?

thanks for reading...

peace.

bg

Twitter: @gossettbrandon

We're really good at listening...

We're really good at listening to the Word, especially here in the South.  We love church.  It's a Sunday "must do" without a doubt.  We put on our Sunday best, make sure the kids have the cutest clothes, and out the door we go...Off to church!  Start the day in Sunday school, read a couple verses, have a couple discussion points.  Follow that up with a service where we sing a couple hymns / praise songs, listen to the preacher, maybe even get "moved" by the sermon or music.  As southerners (at least a large percentage of us), listening to the Word on any given Sunday is a part of our culture.

But when it comes to DOING what the Word says....whoa...and, if we're honest with ourselves...we struggle in this department (or at least I do).

James 1:22 says, "Do not merely listen to the Word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." 

(The phrase, 'and so deceive yourselves', should cause us to raise our eyebrows, but that's for another blog post another time)

Back to the task at hand...

Jesus says in Luke 6:46, "Why do you call me 'Lord, Lord', and not do what I say?"

So why don't we do what the Bible says?  What hinders us?

I saw a great sermon clip one time from Francis Chan about doing what the Bible says.  He used an analogy about telling his daughter to go clean her room.  He said she knows better than to come back to him and say, "Daddy, you told me to clean my room, and I memorized what you said.  And I can say it in the Greek. And now, me and some friends are going to sit around and talk about what it would look like if we went and cleaned my room".  

We would think that's ridiculous if that's what our kids did, right?  And we should.  So, why do we think when it comes to what the Bible says, we can get away with saying that kind of stuff?  Why do we think we can listen to the Word, and not do what we're commanded to do? Yet, we'll quickly throw together a Bible study, small group, or Sunday school class, and really talk about what the Word says.  We'll share on social media how "powerful" a sermon was, talk about "Jesus moving during the service", or "Pastor so and so really brought it this am", etc...  

But, we find ourselves just continuing to sit idly by doing nothing.  Then we go right back to church the next Sunday and go through same religious routine; week after week after week.

In Matthew 28, Jesus says, "Go make disciples of all nations, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you".  

Believers, are we making disciples?  Do we even know what that looks like?  

If we don't know, read the second half of the verse above; teach others what it looks like to follow Jesus.  Show them the Jesus of the Bible; not some middle class American, comfortable, safe, Jesus.  Let's show them what it means to be a disciple of Christ. Show them that He is worth giving our lives for.  Show them the kind of joy and fulfillment in life that comes from being a Christ follower. Let's show them what it means to not just be a listener, but being a DOER of the Word.

thanks for reading...

peace.

bg

Wow, does time fly!

8th grade "Best Dressed"

                                (unfortunately for me, no award for "Best hair".  Could've been a big day)                                           

And now, 21 years later...

"Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 'Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.' - Proverbs 31:28-29

I adore this woman. 

People think I'm nuts when I say that in 7th grade math, I knew I wanted a wife like Kim Joiner.    

Sophomore year of college....she finally gave me a chance!  

Got married, thought I had wild oats to sew, but did Kim give up on me...Nope.  She did the exact opposite.  

She prayed for me.  

My wife truly is "far more precious than jewels. (Prov 31:10)". 

Happy 11th Anniversary to my precious wife, and here's to many more!!

peace.

bg

twitter: @gossettbrandon

"What is this "Gospel" you talk about?"

You ever wondered, "If somebody asked me what the Gospel is, could I clearly tell them?"  I was asked that question a couple of years ago, and really had to think to myself, "could I?". 

As Christians, isn't the Gospel the basis of our identity in Christ?  Without the Gospel, there is no Hope found in Jesus. We parade our Christianity around, but could we even define to a nonbeliever, the CORE message of our faith?  We talk in my small group regularly about testing ourselves to be sure we know the Gospel, and can verbalize it.  As believers, we need to be able to convey the Greatest News of all to a world that is in such need of this message.  Jesus's life, death, and resurrection is the ONLY reason we have hope, for He is the ONLY way to the Father (John 14:6).  

The Gospel is not, "God loves you!", "God has a plan for your life!", "Just live by the Golden Rule", or any sort of "do this, do that" message. The root of the Gospel message is that it is DONE! (John 19:30).  Our responsibility is to repent and believe Christ's work is sufficient.

The Gospel is laid out all throughout the Bible, and by no means are these verses below the only places the Gospel is clearly stated, but I most commonly send people to Ephesians 2:1-10 or
1 Corinthians 15:1-4.

If someone asks me, "What's the Gospel?", usually my response is:  Man is separated from God because of sin.  But God in His infinite mercy and Grace has made a way for us to be reconciled to Him, by sending His only Son, Jesus Christ to live the life we couldn't live, to die the death we deserve, rose from the dead conquering sin and death, and when we believe in Him and His Work, we will have eternal life with God, and shall not perish in a Christless eternity.


Do we believe we the Gospel is the greatest news?  How do you verbalize it to people?

thanks for reading...

peace,
bg
Twitter: @gossettbrandon

P.S. Outside of the Bible, I have found some other books that are great resources for helping us clearly state the Gospel.  "What is the Gospel?" by Greg Gilbert (I bought several copies to give to my small group, family and friends), and "The Explicit Gospel" by Matt Chandler and Jared Wilson.

Why Blog?

I'm not really sure why I decided I wanted to start a blog.  I've always enjoyed other people's blogs, and I think the concept is pretty cool. A lot of my friends blog, and are actually really good at it.  I like telling my stories and opinions as much as the next guy; and I enjoy reading others stories and opinions as well.   I love sharing what I learn from other bloggers, especially in the area of theology.  I find myself drawn to many theological blogs, and then sharing them with my family, friends, or small group.  I believe there is a lot to learn from certain blogs, and I appreciate the people that use their blogs to encourage, educate, or make us laugh.

My blog will consist of opinions, lessons learned, thoughts from Scripture/books/sermons, general conversation, rants, and pontifications.  It will also consist of stories about family, friends, my neighborhood, my city, my country, and this world.  I don't expect many, outside of my mom, to read it, but I am excited to see if it's something I like.

I feel like we live in a world where we're all looking for a way to express ourselves and opinions; i.e. note the success of twitter and facebook.  I happen to be one of those people who enjoy being able to express my thoughts, photos, etc to anyone who will listen (or not listen), and to the world of social media (for those of you who know me, I realize this is a very "Captain Obvious" statement).

Plenty of people have told me "everyone is too busy with their own life to care about what's going on in yours", and I agree with that statement to a degree.  Yet every person I know, except my Dad, is on social media.  So I believe within us there is a desire to know what is going on in each others lives. Not only do we like to know what's going on in the world around us, we LOVE to share what's going in ours.

So, when it comes to social media and my love/hate relationship with it, what better way to describe it than with the famous line used by Dan Cathy of Chick fil a last week, "Guilty as charged".  I enjoy social media, yet get frustrated with it all the same. A personal blog is just another avenue for me to express my opinions, thoughts, etc.  I look forward to beginning this process, and if it gets traffic, great, and if not, oh well.

thanks for reading!

peace,

bg